Craigslist Want Ad Ignorance, or, How Not to Get Hired

As an under-employed creative professional in a souring economy, I careen through various cycles of optimism and pessimism in my quest to secure full-time employment. During my days/weeks/months of searching, I've come across some really horrible employment ads posted by prospective employers. I don't mean horrible as it relates to the description of the actual position offered, but horrible in the incredibly inept and unprofessional way that the job is pitched. One in particular has burned into my brain for being particularly offensive to my editorial sensibilities. I'd almost forgotten about it, but it recently resurfaced in my sent mail folder as I was doing some purging of old email. The original link has long since expired, so I think that enough time has passed that I can now safely assume that I did not score this gig! But I have really wanted to preserve it for all web eternity and felt the need to share it with the world, to give those who don't know me very well a glimpse of my particular brand of humor, to which I've alluded in many a cover letter.

So, without further delay, I present the actual screen grab of my actual email response to an actual ad:

Obviously I don't recommend responding to most ads in this manner, but on that particular morning I must have been in a unusually-cranky mood, and was feeling frustrated by yet another week of being totally ignored by prospective employers who, though they advertise heavily that they are looking for employees, never actually seem to hire anyone. I see the same ads resurface month after month. Who is this perfectly-suited ideal employee that they dream of hiring? If you're hoping to find an experienced art director who knows how to crochet and has 10 years of experience rebuilding car engines, you're not going to find a matching candidate. But you still will be inundated with applicants who --like me-- may not fit all the job requirements, but are willing to learn if given the chance. I always say that I've never been qualified to do any of the jobs that I've done. Given the chance though, I've learned --and mastered-- whatever the job requirements were, and often have become the resident expert... that guy to whom other people come for advice on technical or creative matters. 

But I digress... let me get back to the central issue of the above-referenced job posting. What is particularly galling to me is that --in all seriousness--  I often think, "My God, these people actually have JOBS??!!" With the high rate of unemployed and underemployed workers in this country, how is it possible that there are so many stupid people in high-level jobs? 

There, I said it. I'm serious. We all talk about these people in our workplaces; folks who, for some reason or another, have ascended to positions of power in the company with barely a double-digit IQ. They may be devoid of technical skills, management skills, or lack some other factor that normally would keep them out of the corporate gene pool, but (bless their small intellect) they've succeeding in working their way to middle management or beyond. Everyone in the office knows who these people are, sits at meetings with them, nods approvingly at their inane comments and suggestions, talks about how unbelievably stupid they are (behind their backs), and mutters "I know I could do a better job than that idiot!" In addition, based on the economic consequences of some really bad decisions made by corporate and political leaders in the past few years, I fear there are a lot more of these people running the world than one would expect. And they all think they're so smart...

There have been many studies on intelligence to illustrate this misperception, and some researchers and writers have recently provided an explanation. Essentially, ignorant people over-estimate their own intelligence, and sincerely believe they are smarter that they really are. This is known as "Illusory superiority." Quoting from that source, 

"One of the main effects of illusory superiority in IQ is the Downing effect. This describes the tendency of people with a below average IQ to overestimate their IQ, and of people with an above average IQ to underestimate their IQ. The propensity to predictably misjudge one's own IQ was first noted by C.L. Downing, who conducted the first cross-cultural studies on perceived 'intelligence'. His studies also evidenced that the ability to accurately estimate others' IQ was proportional to one's own IQ. This means that the lower the IQ of an individual, the less capable they are of appreciating and accurately appraising others' IQ. Therefore individuals with a lower IQ are more likely to rate themselves as having a higher IQ than those around them. Conversely, people with a higher IQ, while better at appraising others' IQ overall, are still likely to rate people of similar IQ as themselves as having higher IQs." 

Of course, ignorance is bliss --as was concluded in another study-- so maybe I'd actually be better off living in a cloud of blissful ignorance. Many people seem to get along just fine without knowing very much about the world around them. As further illustration, when I occasionally watch late-night television, I'm always shocked --and dismayed-- to see interviews such as the following: The Tonight Show wth Jay Leno: Jaywalking." It's a train wreck, and done for comedic effect, but it's also a very sad commentary on the state of education in this country. Some of these people will eventually blunder into leadership positions, and that's not funny at all.


This thought-provoking book, "Agnotology: The Making and Unmaking of Ignorance" by Robert Proctor, explores this territory as well, though its central premise focusses more on one's ability to distinguish "knowledge" from "belief." Essentially, what you believe to be true does not make it true. But belief has had profound impact on historical and political events, so it is not a trivial thing. If I will admit to any character flaws, one issue is that I have a low tolerance for stupidity. It's hard to deal with in general, it's difficult to have a logical argument with a ignorant and closed-minded person, and it seems more pervasive in our society than I could have imagined. From the millions who believe the doomsday predictions of wackos with no credibility, to the hoards of computer users who continually re-post along every bit of Internet lore (even though every "This is real!!!" post has been widely and thoroughly debunked), our society seems to get dumber by the second. And in a country where reality TV rules the airwaves and intelligence is looked down upon as a source of shame and mockery, it reminds me far too much of grammar school, when it was so painfully uncool to be a smart kid.

So, this is the environment in which I continually have failed to secure a new job despite my best efforts throughout the past year or so. Every time I read an ad similar to the one I answered so flippantly that day, and during interviews with people who obviously have no business sitting on the other side of the desk, I feel frustrated, and once again hear that familiar refrain in my head, "How come I'm the one without a job??!!" I imagine that these blissfully-ignorant and unqualified people prefer to hire other blissfully-ignorant and unqualified people. Not only do they overestimated their own intelligence, they overestimate the intelligence of those they hire, taking care not to hire someone smarter than themselves, for fear that their own intellectual prowess would be challenged. 

Nobody consciously makes bad hiring decisions, but I am frustrated how some people manage to rise above others in the workplace based solely on their good looks, charisma, and brown-nosing ability, rather than on skill, intelligence, and value to the company's success. I was fortunate enough to have worked for a few very smart bosses in my career, but that is a rare gift; I've suffered under more than my fair share of the other type as well.

So, why then, do I expose the thoughts in my brain here on these pages, and yet continue to feel upbeat and optimistic about my future? Despite the present economic environment, I cling to a hope that I will once again surround myself with other intelligent and creative people, earn a paycheck, and make a contribution to society and the economy. I still believe that such a future is out there somewhere, and that I will find my place in the working world once again. 

I... believe... 

An interesting thought...

Of course, the reality is that I may be totally suffering from delusions. Perhaps, I actually am one of those ignorant people who thinks he's smarter than he actually is. It's a troubling thought. However, if ignorance is bliss, I'm far too aware of what's going on. So, though it's an interesting theory, I have to conclude that --with this self-awareness-- I really am just smart enough to dismiss it!

(My apologies to all the dumb people who accidentally stumbled onto this rant, though you probably didn't make it halfway through all these paragraphs anyway! But if you did somehow make it to the end, congratulations, you're now an official member of the Elitist Liberal Intellectuals!)